Story Time
Thursday, July 28, 2005
**Warning: No Poker Content in this Posting**
"What's that sound?," I asked, knowing without a doubt in my mind that it couldn't be good. I looked around the 8'x8' room, and knew there was only one way out. What I didn't know was what would be waiting for me on the other side of that door.
"Shh...I'll be right back. Stay here," she said. I was hardly reassured. At this point, I could hear that the noise was a garage door openning. That garage was attached to the house, and the door from the garage to the house was a mere 2' from the very room in which I waited.
With nothing to do but wait, I started thinking about an exit strategy. A mere fifteen minutes before, I pulled up to my girlfriend's house and saw a note on her door. "Jordan- I'm in the shower. Come on in. -L"
I was a highschool senior and L was a sophomore. We met several months before through a your organization, and we immediately took to each other. I followed the note's instructions a little too literally.
After parking my car on the street, I came downstairs to L's bathroom. The girl, like many girls would do, had acquisitioned the families' second bathroom as her own. Unfortunately, the location was less than ideal. It was on the landing between the kitchen steps (up) and the den steps (down). On that landing were three doors: the bathroom, the garage, and the sliding backyard door.
I didn't hear the shower on, and was disappointed that I missed the moment, but L was still in the bathroom doing whatever girls do as they stare in the mirror in a towel. We didn't do much. No. I did, however, take my shirt off, and toss it without a care into the hallway. Her parents both worked and shouldn't be home for another hour. I would need about 1 1/2 minutes once game time started. Unfortunately, one of the wardens came home early, and it was time to scramble.
'It's cold in here', I thought, shirtless and hiding with my pants and shoes on in her shower. 'At least if her mother or father come in here, they might not open the curtain.' Suddenly the door openned. I winced as the curtain was pulled back. My shirt was thrown at me, and I fumbled a bit before I caught it. "You left this in the hallway!" It was L, thank the lord. "Who is it out there?"
I knew there were two choices: Mom or Dad. Dad was a large, but friendly guy. I liked him a lot, but he was always ignored by the family. He had lost his job a while back and found a new one. But I don't think he was ever able to regain the respect or head-of-household role that he deserved. All this said, I didn't know how he would react to finding me in an intimate position with his teenage daughter. Every man has his limits, and this was it. On the other hand, L's mother was a shark. Her and L always seemed to be fighting, probably for alpha female status. She was nice to me, but I had no doubt that she would clip my balls if she found me in the bathroom. Which one would it be?
"My Dad's home." I was semi-relieved. "We have to get you out of here. I'll keep him occupied." She left in a hurry.
"Hi Daddy," I heard her say as I slowly openned the door. They were in the kitchen, around a corner, so I was fortunately out of sight. L, with some foresight, has unlocked the sliding glass door. It was now or never. I moved the 10' with stealth. I knew that if the Big Man turned that corner, I'd be in direct sight from the top of the kitchen steps. I was glad when I finally eased the door shut behind me. But now, I had to make it out of the yard.
Like a ninja, I clinged to the wall as I rounded the corner of the house. I moved swiftly but silently to the front of the house, easing into the neighbors yard. The block was deserted except for the passing car.
Oh shit! My car! It was parked in front of the house. I had to leave it.
A lap around the block, and I returned to L's home with a plan. "Hello?" I asked as I entered the front door. "Hey, Jordan. Where were you?" the Big Man asked as he looked through the mail. Good, his attention was elsewhere. Now lets try out the well-planned lie.
"Eh, I came to see L, but she was in the shower. She left a note, but I decided to go around the corner to see Lori." Lori was a mutual friend. Thank god for Lori and her nearby home. I'd call her later that day to get our stories straight, just in case.
"Well, L's out now, but I think she's getting dressed."
"No problem. I'll wait for her here. Don't want to disturb her while she's getting ready."
I say this with total sincerity. On that day, and to this day, I have thanked god for the escape. If we didn't hear the garage, if she didn't get my shirt in time, if I didn't get to that back door or come up with my Lori alibi, it would've been ugly. Ugly. On that day, I had one thought: "God wanted us to hook up. Thank you god. I am the Golden Child."
posted by Jordan @ 12:27 PM,
4 Comments:
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At 11:52 PM,
said...
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What a lovely story about you and your eventual fiancee
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At 11:59 PM,
Jordan said...
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Um...yeah. That isn't my fiance I'm writing about. Hmm...
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At 12:24 AM,
said...
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Thats a great one!! I think I was in the basement when my litle gametime adventure happened...
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At 1:25 AM,
said...
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tell us about the fiance
