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So it Goes

-$100. Yep. I finally lost. Why, you ask? Well, folks, when you reach the pinnacle of Mt. Success, it's natrual that you are going to see the other side of the mountain, Variance Valley!

Yep. Admittedly, some of the losses were due to bad play. I entered the WWdn Not last night for the first time, and proceeded to embarass myself. I just played awefully, and got my ass handed to me. To be fair, my last hand was QQ v. KJ. Preflop I make a 4x BB raise, and KJ calls. The flop is K-high, but all diamonds (I don't have one). I decide to push. Yeah, great move.

But before that, it seemed that variance was just having its way with me. I had A9 and flopped top two-pair. I bet the pot the entire way, only to be called every step of the way by 55, who hit runner runner straight. I don't know what he was thinking. Probably, "Hmm, it sure is fun winning money." I left that room down $50. I lost $50 in another room also, although I don't remember any of my catclysmic play.

I didn't, unfortunately, play in the home game of the I Had Outs girls. Girls, I'm sorry. I truly am a poker degenerate, but I had some business at home to handle. Without me there, the field was probably MUCH weaker, so I'm sure one of you ladies took down some nice dough. Keep in mind for next time though. I'm personally very disappointed that I couldn't attend.

I don't really feel much for blogging about poker. A -$100 night can do that to a man. I do, however, need to give a couple of shoutouts to some random fellow bloggers. Hoyazo deserves a round of applause for some of his recent posts. He did a nice job of discussing why he plays poker and it got me thinking. I also have to clap it up to Bloody P. I've been playing in SNGs with the P a lot lately, mostly $1 and $2 tournaments on Noble (bonus code: HighPoker). It's been fun. I played two last night (he wasn't able to get into the first one in time) and placed 4th/6 in both. I have to admit that I don't play my best in the micro stakes. But I had a great time. Funny how it was only a year and a few months ago when I considered $5 tournaments to be too high.

This weekend I will be on Long Island the entire time. A family friend of wifey Kim's is having a bar mitzvah (it's a Jew thing), and its at the temple where wifey Kim and I were married. It should be nice to actually experience the place, rather than host a party where everything is happening around you and there is no time to stop and smell the salmon. Mmmm...salmon.

The net effect of my LI trip will be little, if any, poker. I will, however, get drunk on free booze on a Sunday afternoon. It's not a bad consolation prize.

Finally, I leave you with a quick story about my recent Settlement Conference. Two days ago (or was it three?) I wrote about my anticipation for the conference. The way it was explained to me, the female 90-year-old judge was going to grill me and try to force me into settling by insulting my age, knowledge, character and finally, fashion sense (good luck there,, judge lady). I finally had the conference yesterday.

I got to the Courthouse at 8:45. I couldn't see the judge until 9:30 (and even then, I had to wait for my adversary), so I found a seat on a bench in the hall and pulled out Freakonomics, my current light reading. As I'm sitting, I hear someone call out my case name. My adversary was early too. We introduced ourselves and sat down. She was covering for another attorney and knew nothing about the case. I was covering for another attorney and had prepared, but you can never fully prepare.

So, we sat on the bench for 20 minutes or so, trying to cram for the upcoming Judge's exam. We shared notes like a couple of desperate teens before their final exams.

Finally, we get called in to see the judge. "We need you to fill out this form," the bailiff says. The judge is not in the room, but is probaby nearby. My opposing counsel fills out their part and hands the rest to me. I'm writing when I see an roley-poley grey-haired man sit down in the judge's chair. I ignore the Y-chromosome for the time being, as I feverishly fill in the form which was supposed to be done BEFORE we see the judge.

"So, tell me about the case?" The grilling had begun. As I wrote, my adversary began to talk. "Well, there is an appeal pending right now." "So it isn't going to settle." Now I look up, but she talks first, "Probably not." The judge looks down at his papers. "Okay counselors, do you want to come back here or should I remand?" He looked at me.

Now, here is the thing. I had an imperfect amount of information. My Team Leader told me that he didn't want to go back to the Court for another conference, and that we were ready for trial. However, I only knew the term Remand in one context, and this wasn't it. What to do? I evaded his question.

"Well, Your Honor, we are ready to go to trial." "Okay," the Judge replied, "Remanded!" STAMP! "Um, thank you, Your Honor." I scurried out of the room. Boom, I'm on my cell phone, talking to one of the partners. "Hey, ________, I'm at the courthouse and the Judge just remanded the case. Um, what does remand mean?" It meant that we were going to trial.

Thank fucking god.

Lawyerin' ain't easy, but, yo, it ain't hard no!

posted by Jordan @ 9:05 AM,


At 9:42 AM, Anonymous DP said...

"Lawyerin' ain't easy, but, yo, it ain't hard no!"

LOL! You're awesome.

At 9:43 AM, Anonymous Tom said...

Hahah. Nice!

Bummer about the poker downswing, but it happens. You'll bounce back.

At 10:22 AM, Anonymous Kipper said...

Sounds like you hit a runner-runner for a complete suck-out

"Well, Your Honor, we are ready to go to trial." "Okay," the Judge replied, "Remanded!" STAMP! "Um, thank you, Your Honor."

At 10:59 AM, Anonymous dawn summers said...

You were definitely missed! Hope you make the next one.

At 11:00 AM, Anonymous Bloody P said...

Have fun this weekend, yo. Hit me up when you get back. I MAY even play a Rio with you. $20?? GASP!!!


At 11:44 AM, Anonymous DP said...

I also like the post title.


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