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Will Give Legal Advice for Chips

Hi folks! Let me start by directing my readers and JapTrix to this post about the origin of the picture of me and an AK-47. Moving on...

I hope you are all having a wonderful day! I sure am. I won 2 out of 4 games last night, although for the life of me, I can only remember that I came in 1st in one. The other, who the fuck knows!

So, why am I so cheery this fine afternoon. I got laid off, of course! Yep. Here is an overall recap on why Jordan, the Hip Hop attorney got laid off. First, I was working for a department which only serviced a single client. The client started bitching and moaning about the work performed at my office. In all of this, a couple of people were singled out, but I was not included (as far as I knew). Months after the rumbling began, the client instructed that certain attorneys could no longer work on their cases. I was surprised to discover that I was one of the chosen ones. I asked the partner the reason for it. Why did I get singled out? My two superiors were more shocked than I was. As a new attorney, I was doing work that was way above my experience level. That said, my superiors overlooked everything before it went out. Not the quick, 'it looks ok to me', but the thorough red-pen type of editing. So, my work was quality, and of my 11 cases, I expected 6 to settle or be decided in our favor by the end of August.

When I got removed from the group, I was bummed. But at least I had my job at a law firm that paid reasonably (although below market) and had 9-5 hours (very rare!). I angled myself into a new group, and was continuing my work. I heard rumors of a couple of firms in need, so I sent out some resumes. I still await responses.

Then today, I went to court this morning. When I got back to the office, a note was waiting for me on my chair:



Please call me.

-Partner X

Now, Partner X is the same guy who told me that the client didn't want me on their files. I knew there was trouble. Fast-forward to when he gets to my office.

Partner X: Well, we've lost the client and we have to shift people around. We just don't have the work to sustain blah-blah-blah-blah. I'm sorry I have to do this, but you are being terminated. We're going to keep you on til Sept. 30.

[In my head: SWEET! Sept. 30th is right before my wedding. Fuck this. I'm so out of here anyway.]

Jordan: May I be frank. I was never told why I was taken off of the cases, and now I have no real reason why I am being terminated. It is what it is, and I understand that, but it would be so much easier with answers.

X: Blah-blah-blah.

And that was it. I told some co-workers. I called my family. I have a trouble keeping news to myself. I called Kim.

The truth is, I am legitimately happy. I've had enough of this place. Its time to move on, and this just lit a fire under my ass.

A phrase keeps running through my head: "Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks." Its from a Snoop Dogg song, and its wholly inappropriate. But there it is, running through my head on loop. What does it mean? Well, I guess it means that this isn't a big deal. This bullshit ain't nothing. I smile when I think about being laid off because what else is there to do?

If anyone has any suggestions as to my upcoming job search, please feel free to leave them in the comments or email me at Thanks for reading.

Professional Poker Player ain't sounding too bad right about now...

posted by Jordan @ 12:27 PM,


At 4:11 PM, Blogger GaryC said...

Let me be the first to offer my condolences on the lay-off. Let me also be the first to say fuck them!
You know what I tell my boss when he gets on my nerves, "I was looking for a job when I found this one." Someone with your education and experience won't be out of work, unless you choose to be.
For every door that closes, another 3 or 4 open. Look at it as an opportunity.
Hang in there, brother.


P.S. Did I use enough cliches?

At 5:14 PM, Blogger Jordan said...

Hey, G, you are right. There are plenty of more fish in the sea. Just because I was laid off, I shouldn't be upset. One man's garbage is another man's treasure. When the going gets tough, the tough gets going. I need to use some elbow grease and get this gravy train moving.

Hahaha. In all seriousness, thanks. I'm solid, and this is surprisingly rolling off my back very easily. Its good to know people have my back. Maybe I'll apply to some lawyer jobs in Omaha. Oh wait, I'm not that much of a masacist.

At 6:04 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Shit Jordan I am sorry about the news. That really blows. But hey you could have gotten laid off in a worse place like Omaha or worse yet Erie!

Well being in NYC and it sounds like you have a great fiance for support, etc you should have no problem finding another job!

Do you know anything about Hitachi? I may hire you if they dont fix my TV that is under warranty!!

Oh and if you need a reference on the professional poker player job let me know I will vouche for you!!


At 6:18 PM, Blogger TripJax said...

Fuck'em dude. A job is a job and things always seem to work out for the best so don't sweat it.

Go get a better job and then raise the middle finger to dem ho's.

You seem to be taking it quite well, which is why I am holding back on the feeling bad for you part...


p.s. Time for you to start 8 tabling the $5 SNG's

At 9:59 PM, Blogger D said...

Sux that on a day I receive great news, you receive that. Oh well at least you seem happy about it. I am sure you will get something soon, that is of course better for you. GL

At 1:00 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

see if you can get something at stroock and stroock...i think the hours suck,,but its where money is at..


At 2:55 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

you cant spell team with an i....

At 10:07 AM, Blogger GaryC said...

"Maybe I'll apply to some lawyer jobs in Omaha." - J

A little geography lesson for you today:Omaha is in the state of Nebraska. Oklahoma City is in the state of Oklahoma. Two entirely different parts of the universe, if you've never been to either one.

If you spent two weeks in Omaha, you would think Oklahoma City is New York City, by comparison. I am pretty sure there are cattle crossings in the city limits of Omaha.

Just a little geography lesson on a saturday morning for you.


At 4:38 PM, Blogger Jordan said...

Dube? As in Rivers? Shite man, did I tell you about this site?

Yo, everyone. TripJax has it right. Don't feel sorry for me (except for my lack of geography knowledge). I'm a fighter. This won't mean shit. If anything it is a blessing.


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